Donald Trump Polygonal Portrait
I am an artist.
I am the one who is helping to make America great again.
I put the finishing touches on my new masterwork: a vector image of Donald Trump in a tuxedo, staring off into the distance. It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever created, and will help the cause immensely.
I hit the save button on my computer, and the file is officially finished. Donald Trump’s polygonal portrait is finished. America will become great again, because my artwork is exactly what will convince the people of America that Donald Trump is a good businessman, politician, and an all-around great guy.
I have never met Donald Trump. I almost went to one of his rallies in Columbus a couple months ago, but I was too busy at work to attend, and my wife doesn’t like the man anyway. If my image takes off, though, maybe he will like me enough to invite me to his tower, make me a good old fashioned Trump Steak, and we can feast together.
I imagine the looks on people’s faces at work when they see my polygonal portrait of Donald Trump. “Wow,” they’ll say. “You’re such a good artist! I had never seen Donald Trump in such a light until I saw this picture!” And I’ll look at them, smile, and nod. I will say nothing.
I think America’s gone down into the pits. I don’t really follow politics all that much, but I know for a fact that it sucks now. Obama has been a bad president. We always lose now. I lost my job in 2008 because of that idiot Bush, and I didn’t get one back until I became an artist. No thanks to Obama there.
I look at my masterpiece one more time, and imagine the look on Corey Lewandowski’s face as he sees my picture. He will shed a tear, and immediately forward it to Donald himself. He’ll add to his email, “Look at this….. I love it!!!!” and as soon as Donald sees it, I’ll shoot to the stratosphere.
I worked in a factory. Guess where they moved it? Mexico. That’s right. The place where everyone’s leaving to come up to America, is the place where my job, and the jobs of many others, are going. Soon, America is going to be a jobless wasteland full of poor people. Unless Donald Trump becomes President, that is.
I can’t wait for everything to happen. In fact, just so the legal issues won’t impede anyone from using my picture, I’m going to release it as public domain. Yep, right now. Donald Trump’s polygonal portrait is free for all human beings to use. Including Donald Trump himself.
I’m going to be famous, America is going to be great again, and people will begin to heal again.
I hit upload and the portrait comes online.
I shed a tear.