“Plug into the Adventure!” screams the cover art of this movie. “Not on your life!” I scream back, sobbing into my pillow at night, remembering the five minutes of this film I was awake for at six years old. Continue reading “[Movies We Haven’t Watched] The Brave Little Toaster” »
This is a story that was written in collaboration with a friend of mine who wishes to be designated as “Traindick McIronpunch”. I hope you very much enjoy it.
Inane and Stupid
It was another hot day in July for Wizards star Michael Jordan as he walked down the pathways of existence, contemplating why he was a human being and not a star, like he felt deep within his heart– nay, his soul. His very being called out to the stars, like he was one of them. And yet he was not one, because he was a human being on the planet Earth, far away from any star except the measly yellow sun named Sol. What could one human being possibly do in the expanse of the universe, even a human being like Michael Jordan, do compared to even one single star? Not much.
Abruptly, Michael Jordan realized that it was 2015 and he wasn’t actually on the Wizards anymore. Woe took his soul; was he even still alive? Public opinion didn’t care about him outside his role in Space Jam, and even that was enjoyed ironically. Existential numbness shook Michael to his core. The starfathers would not be happy about this.
Hey. There are some spoilers over here.