Mitt Romney’s Dream at 2:30 AM on January 27th, 2016
Foreword: All Primary maps were generated using a cool tool from RealClearPolitics. Check it out here. You may have to open the maps in a different tab to view them in full-size.
January 27th, 2016
Mitt Romney laid over in his bed and his face hitt Ann’s back. It woke him up, his eyes jolting open. His vision was blurry and his mind was spinning from whatever he was dreaming about.
He then felt the warmth of his blanket and of Ann’s back. He put his arm around her, put his head back against his pillow, and closed his eyes.
It was a very long, cold night, and Mitt’s mind cleared into an icy Iowan landscape, one that he was so familiar of, for all those years before…
January 29th, 2016
Sean Hannity turned to Mitt in that same-as-always spin and smiled. “So here on the show today we have a very special guest coming to talk to us. It’s former Massachusetts Governor and Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney. Mitt, how are you today?”
John Bolton and Peter King sat in a dimly-lit, cigarette smoke-filled bar, both of them sipping on vodkas and listening to awful country music in the background. A woman, intentionally showing as much cleavage as possible, walked by, trying to get one of them to buy her a drink. King started to raise his hand to get the bartender’s attention, but Bolton caught it and lowered it.
“Don’t bother,” Bolton said. “She wants your money, not your dick.”
King gave a half-hearted shrug and kept at his drink.